Staying successfully motivated: It's all in a mindset

"Through passion and desire, anything in life is possible." - I wrote this quote, and attach it to almost everything I do, because if you think about it, they both are behind anyone who is successful. Whether the success is mainly in their career, or personal lives, or both - passion and desire fuel success.

Staying on track with your visions and life goals is not easy. Even the most determined and successful people get taken off course by one thing or another, but those individuals will always find their way back by holding fast to their visions and beliefs, and most importantly, sticking to a positive mindset.

Life happens, with throwing curveballs, but it's how you bounce back from those obstacles. Take the time needed to go through the necessary emotions, because that's only being human, then find a way to concentrate on moving forward, better than ever. I've found that choosing different life choices from time to time is imperative to keep being your best self and continue to grow. I believe in, everything happens for a reason, even if the reason isn't obvious or doesn't make sense at the moment, sometimes making a change is a necessity to keep your passion alive. Always remember, just by trying your best, and giving it your all, makes you a success in more ways than one.

If you're feeling in a rut or can't seem to find the motivation you need to get back on track, try some of these life changes:

• Change your eating habits (Better food choices/better eating schedule)

• Develop a personal workout routine (Anything can fit in the busiest of schedules - make "me time" for physical health)

• Take 5 minutes for meditation (Clearing the mind really can help you focus better)

• Re-evaluate your friend choices (You really do become who you spend time with - people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime)

• Re-evaluate your job (Is your job a steppingstone to achieve what you want, or is it hindering you? Can you find a better pathway to your goal?)

• Make a list of what you love to do - ignite your passion and desire in life (See how you can integrate those things into a career, social hobby, and recreation)

• Mindset: You can't make everyone happy (If you try, you will end up being the unhappy one)

• Mindset: Take care of yourself, because if you don't how are you supposed to take care of others.

We are all creative souls in one way or another, so take that creativity and design ways to keep a positive mindset travelling on the road of success.

There is one topic that I want to bring up to be mindful of in your daily life: social media usage.

In my opinion the number one modern-day denominator of sometimes being negatively sidetracked from your successful mindset is social media. The trollers, hateful comments, fake accounts, and sometimes fake posts, largely account for negative thoughts, even depressive ones. With addictive social media scrolling constantly on the rise, daily misperceptions of reality also increase. This is where finding the ability to be able to separate reality from screen time is crucial.

However, social media does have its amazing attributes. Helpful information can reach millions across the country and world in a matter of a couple minutes, especially in the event of a crisis. Ways of learning how to do new things is readily out there. You can stay connected to people who live far away that you don't get to see often. My personal favorite is for those who feel like if they're alone in a certain situation are able to find relatability through social media, and mostly through strangers who they otherwise would have never met. I've found comfort this way more than once.

The key to staying motivated in today's modern-day society is honestly to find it within yourself to focus on your passion and desire in real-time and know how to differentiate between the useful and not-so-useful social media posts. Concentrate on what drives you to success and not what blocks it.

Part of the motivation behind this blog is from a specific chapter I wrote in Laughing Out of Context: Chapter 22 - Mom Social Media Envious, the excerpt below is from that chapter to emphasize the importance of separating screen time from real-life time:

“Last week, I commented on a Facebook post from an acquaintance I know through Kristin. You know Kristin in our mom’s group.”

Ella does a slow nod.

“Her mom friend, Ruby, has become a mutual friend of ours, just through Facebook. Ruby was commenting on her own glamorous party picture from when she went out on a girl’s night, dancing. She then started going back and forth with another mom. I didn’t know the other lady. Ruby was arguing about how all us moms should be going out and glamming up, and—”

“Oh no, she didn’t,” Ella interrupts me. “See that’s why I don’t like social media, Mia.” She throws her hands above her head. “It’s unrealistic.”

“I couldn’t agree more. Normally, I don’t argue with anyone online, especially not knowing the person personally, but I felt I had to. Ruby was making this other mom, Trisha was her name, feel bad because she has no time to go out and party.”

“Like what parent really does?” Ella says with annoyance kicking in. She lets out a guffaw. “So, what made you bring out the Teacher Savior thing?”

“When Ruby started trying to belittle me for sticking up for Trisha, I wrote that I am the Teacher Savior at my school, proving that she can’t bring me down.”

Ella bursts out laughing. “You finally used the title, and let it go to your head a little bit.” She continues to laugh. “Well, in this instance anyway. What’s funny is that this Ruby doesn’t even know what a Teacher Savior is, since it’s a made up title.”

I make a funny face and shrug my shoulders, because I know she’s right.

“I love that you stood up for Trisha, though, but you see how people argue online, and they don’t even know who they’re arguing with. There’s a reason online bullying and trolling is so big these days. They find it easy to go after someone without having to face them in person.”

She shakes her head side to side, angry. Her shiny black Egyptian Goddess hair and tan skin glisten against the sunlight pouring in through the window at our table. Somehow, even Mad Ella seems to keep her elegant composure.

I don’t know how she does it. When I’m mad, I get all beet-red and huffy. My blood pressure rises, making me feel like lava is flowing throughout my veins. I strive to be more like Ella, and keep myself composed, for the most part, which will do me a world of good.

“I know, it’s terrible,” I reply, shaking my head too.

“Well, don’t go making this a habit with getting someone all riled up, because you’re sticking up for a random person, you don’t even know, online. I don’t want to have to find someone and tell them off for messing with you.”

She reaches across the table and pats my hand, then chuckles. “Besides, you don’t even know if that individual you’re defending is real. Fake accounts are made all the time, just to create drama situations.”

I sharply nod. “You’re right, because in the school group I started for anti cyber bullying, that exact thing happened to Mrs. Write. She shared her experience with a group of fifth graders. Some hacker actually made a fake account using her info, but with a slight change.”

Ella closes her eyes and sighs. “See, things like that happen all the time. I’ve broken away from social media a lot lately. Besides, it was getting to a point of distracting me from Marcus.”

“Yeah, me too. After that Ruby incident, I realized more of a break was needed, and that type of aggravation takes my mind away from Cody too.”

With all the scams and impersonal communication in the mix these days, we need to do our best to stay grounded and concentrated on the positives within our in-person connections and life. Filter through posts, and online sources, to pay attention to the good ones for you. Not to mention, like in the excerpt above, find it within yourself not to compare your life routine to another's posted on social media. Everyone has their trials and tribulations, ups and downs, even though they may not post about it, they have challenges like everyone else. Never forget that.

To add on to my point, I like to repeat something Raymond says from the show Everybody Loves Raymond, “Editing. Keep the good ones.” This was the theme of his best man's speech at his brother’s wedding, which had a lot of unpleasant moments/unplanned hiccups on that day. Raymond was referring to editing out the not pleasant memories and to hold on to the good memories of the day.

A strong message and lesson: Editing of life.

Keep the good ones.

Just as others may edit to say and show things that might not be naturally in true form, you can edit your mindset in life to keep motivation going. 

Stay positive, and never let go of a vision and dream, passion and desire, because this is your life to live, and no one else's.

May success follow you through all opened doors!